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Conversation with my Mom today
Mom: When I was your age I was so skinny I was able to count all my ribs and feel my hipbones, but you know what, I wasn't happy. I am happier now than I ever was then.
Me: Well... that's because you're old.
Mom: True, the fucks just roll off my back.
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hiitsmekevin:

Roman’s not a Boliever

hiitsmekevin:

Roman’s not a Boliever

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kamikatlifts:

IT’S. A. FUCKING. TURTLE.

kamikatlifts:

IT’S. A. FUCKING. TURTLE.

(Source: yodiscrepo, via hard-workpaysoff)

guy:

being cremated is my last hope of getting a hot, smoking body

(Source: guy, via tardis-enterprise)

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lucifers-ass-cheek:

posts that are only funny because of the fucked up comments part 1

(via feathers-n-freckles)

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waweyn:

She just died like 17 times in that fight

waweyn:

She just died like 17 times in that fight

(Source: loboculiao, via hard-workpaysoff)

mustachossom:

when u tell ur friend a plot twist for ur story

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(via carry-on-my-wayward-butt)

pebbles5ever:

hypno-angex:

suklaaaa:

bunnyinafez:

iwantfitbody:

madamedepompador:

winchesterwolves:

moniker-padacklyte:

zillystring:

wasereborworthit:

mellowminty:

pizzaforpresident:

petition to rename the usa ‘south canada’

what about alaska

are we then normal canada

canada a bit to the left

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What about South America? Is that just America? Or South South Canada?

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i cried my ass of laughing

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WARM CANADA

i caN’T BREATHE OH MY GOD

I’m not even from Canada but I approve this change of names

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(via definitionofawriter)